Chapter One – Fred
‘You wouldn’t believe it, would not fucking believe it’, Fred said to himself. ‘I’m living a storytale cartoon book’. This is the truth of it.
All his life, all his years that he remembers someone in just about every group calls him Fred Flintstone.
Let’s digress before continuing, he has moved up a little bit. Not so long ago he had a backpack and a few friends, a little bit of money. Less long ago his car and a swag were home, no friends, no family, less money. The moment he was completely honest about this, all though it may not be the reason, with the woman he was potentially going to have sex with, well, he hasn’t had sex with. Has not heard back from her.
So from there, to the day after telling her this living in his own little space with two little caravans to himself on a most phenomenally beautiful place. It is heaven, it is the funniest fucking thing, it is his own joke on himself. He knows this, it’s why he is writing it. Winning at it.
Back to where we are. A Goanna, two of them, big ones just mosied on past. I bet should he look to his left there will be kangaroos grazing. Ha, nope, green grass and trees buddy. No kangaroos to the right, okay, well, they have been there. Looking out from the deck of the van he lives in at this phenomenal mountain, it’s name is Mount Barney.
This is where he lives, this is where he knows phenomenal things are going to happen, it’s a joke. He was looking for something to bring in a little money and fill in some time, showed up at a random place he saw advertising a Groundskeeper job on a poster and that’s how he got here. Just gave it a go.
Almost only lasted three weeks but, no, we’re still going. ‘This is going to be fun’ pops into his head. It already is.
Fred is living and working at Mount Barney. Fred looks outside of his little home in the morning and is greeted to a beautiful spider web, it’s Charlotte’s Web. Dino is the tractor the owner’s have been dumb enough to give him the keys to, just ask his mate Josh. Josh, he knows. He and Dino are getting along alright though, did some mad arse compost turning this morning. Fuckin’ booyah’d that pile. It’s sushi; dirt, carbon and nitrogen and probably a heap of rat and mouse shit. All the good stuff.
Pebbles is the ridiculously fun, and fairly fast, lawnmower he zips around on for two days a week. They are littering the crystal clear creek too, the pebbles, they litter it beautifully. There is very little trash litter. Pebbles is a magic time, in both instances.
His caravans might as well be Fred and Barney’s little huts. One Fred couldn’t fit in, the other he could just, his head is in danger of going through Barney’s roof. No actual Barney here though, yet.. He chose the worst of the two to live in because it is bigger and both ended up being equally difficult to want to live in. To this point he has made one beautiful on the inside and made significant bounds to making the other on the outside. Just for shits and fucking giggles he may paint them like the cartoon soon enough.
Not now, not yet, this is his agreement with the owners, the caravans would not take attention. Fred’s got news for you buddy they were, these things were not nice. They don’t take attention, they are beautiful. One day, one day, he’ll Flintstone them.
He wasn’t happy with the agreement between him and the owner being broken, that they would listen to one another. Communicate. It broke down, there was a battle, a mini battle in the village but so far they’re working it out. Nothing to see here.
Wilma and Thelma (?), not sure their part yet but we will see what happens.
There’s a bit of ET here too, a fair bit of travel, Fred doesn’t leave his seat for much of it, walks and does stuff at others. Still the journey is real, Jesters and Dragons are real. Mostly, he just eats a plant or two, sometimes something a little different and experiences the universe. Alone and with others, has a mountain of fun. Occasionally watches people shit their pants, done it himself.
There are beasts and bosses, wins and losses, never a backward step. There will continue to be devils and demons, there will be more wins than losses.
This is Fred’s game my friends. Now we have introduced the basics, the bare surface of this game. let’s explore it. So, with no further ado, here comes chapter two.
Chapter Two – The Narrator
Won’t be doing that anymore, introducing the next chapter. Figured poetry why not, give it a whirl. Let’s unwhirl it for now. Where was he?
It doesn’t matter. The narrator wants you reader to understand how Fred will show you he is playing his game. That this is a game he/you is/are playing with himself/yourself. Give the ending away a little at the beginning. I guarantee it will be indisputable, it will make you question the things he has already brought to your attention. In doing so he is going to show you that one person with nothing and nobody can make a difference, he will show you this. Again, it will be indisputable.
The process here, me, the narrator wrote the author’s introduction, the introduction, chapter one and then chapter two. A different chapter two. The narrator reread it, it wasn’t quite right. Chapter two was a better chapter one and vice versa. Changed it, read it, chapter one, which is now chapter two but isn’t any more wasn’t necessary, it is gone. Chapter One was a great chapter one, it was a better introduction, the introduction was a great intro but a better chapter one. Deleted a line from the author’s introduction and we are at where we are.
This is the writing process, there is no plan, just giving it a go. Taking the time to get it right.
How will Fred show you? He is writing and recording all the clues in this story for you. He is presenting himself these clues to succeed in this challenge. This challenge to get through to you. The conclusion to this will be the conclusion to the understanding, accepting and putting all the clues together. The answer will be presented, the answer is the solution that solves this challenge. That, Fred guesses, is the plot.
He will, I can only guess, tell you exactly how every line fits together. He will outline the patterns. He will show you the tricks and treats he plays on himself, with himself. You will not be able to deny it, mere coincidence will not cover it. You will already know he knew everything all along. This is synchronicity. Syncronicity is the patterns, the games you are playing with yourself.
Now, where is Fred?
Aah, about to suck on a durrie while somewhat planning to shower. We’ll get back to the story later.
Fred’s pretty okay with the work he has done today. The two caravans that couldn’t be lived in are almost the two that can. A big day of painting, for a day off anyway. ‘People do that all day, every day?’, is the question he already knows the answer to, he queries anyway. He is learning to paint, not giving a shit about the other stuff.
Doesn’t care about getting the masking tape exactly right, the lines exactly even, whether the colours and the look is what he wants it to be. Not even sanding. No he wanted to learn to paint, his own technique. He has all the information already, has heard it all before, he simply wants to learn it his way. The caravans are his canvas to learn. He’s done well. Both are not too far off being finished on the outside.
‘This is the point’, he thinks. The condition inside the guest caravan was a bug in this throat, he wanted to clean it as priority but still hasn’t. The greater priority is the painting, it’s the biggest job. A couple of full days work and counting. Not too far to go. Once the big job is done he knows all the little jobs he can do at anytime. Even thoroughly clean Barney’s van, it’s tiny, two or three hours maximum. Small job.
That’s it, here on in the caravans are presentable, they are sufficient to the needs required. But now, now, ooh ooh ooh, Fred knows he gets to have fun with them, make them him, tinker. ‘Hmmmmm’, it’s not a sound or a word this thought, it’s a knowing. Fred wonders how he brings his brothers and sisters into this journey. He knows he has to wait.
It is a few days later now, I have to go back to the Author’s Introduction. Returning to Fred’s waiting. The introduction of the author is now very different to what it was when the line was deleted. This whole thing is now the Groundskeeper. It has had a full scale change and a bit of titanforging.
A day of painting on acid has brought me to the conclusion to that journey for a pickle jar. I found them. Yes, it definitely ended in this, this is that conclusion. At the same time this conclusion my friends is just the start, just the very beginning. From here on in the narrator introduce’s the Groundskeeper, let’s him speak.
Chapter 3 – Marina
Ooh Fred gets to play, he gets to write, he gets to create videos. He gets to share these with you. Fun, fun, fun. Fred really likes new toys, this one has a particularly fun flavour to it.